AsterMaris, 38 - 27 сентября 2007 09:38

The brand name for love

And-of course- that damned feeling of loneliness has now taken hold of me as well. It’s so acute, complete and overwhelming that sometimes it gets hard to breathe, to walk, to talk, to smile like normal human individuals, when you feel on the edge of an utter breakdown and you know you’ll be standing on this edge forever and will never ever actually break down and not a single leaf will stir around you though inside there is an ocean that could burst out any moment of this ‘big long now’ that, in the end, turns out to be life and you float like a feather in someone else’s thoughts, ideas and quotations wondering where am I, what am I, where I come from and where I’m going Now.
Although being lonely is not a synonym to being single I can see many examples around how people confuse it and, being a black hole inside, find another black hole and make couples, messing up sex with love, habit with love, dependence with love, ego with love whatever else with that l-word that has turned into a fake, a phantom, a big lie, a game, a brand name, a toyshop for any age and being an intent gazer it is so easy to see that there is nothing in this monkey parade where everyone is deaf and blind, taking their ideas of reality for The Reality, having ready-made notions for Everything. Global Network of Stereotypes, Ltd or Inc or whatever should follow. They see my beautiful body and are genuinely surprised why I don’t agree to have mechanical sex right here and right now. And instead of shouting all aloud ‘people, open your eyes’ like a madman that has just run away from the asylum I would just stand with my eyes wide open and say, ‘So what?’ though in my heart I have ‘Is there anyone here who can See, who is still Alive, who can-’ Can You?

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